I was recently in a discussion about forgiveness and unforgiveness. A friend mentioned that she had forgiven someone who did not ask for forgiveness, but things continue to happen that cause her to think she hasn't really forgiven the person. "Maybe I haven't really forgiven them," was her concern. I think we all deal with this at some level. It is easy to imagine that once we forgive someone we move on. But the difficult reality is that forgiveness is a "gift" that keeps on giving. It is like giving your child a remote control car for Christmas. You feel really good about your decision until you realize you have to buy batteries every week. Often times you end up forgiving someone who doesn't think they have hurt you or doesn't care that they have hurt you. When you forgive this person, it is likely that they will not have 'moved on.' So they may do things that test your forgiveness. And I think it is fair that forgiveness is tested. If forgiveness is not tested, how can we know it is real? It is easy to say the words, "I forgive" without living out true forgiveness. So, when you have made the decision to forgive, and then the offending party continues to hurt you, you may feel like you are having to forgive again. At this point the enemy will tell you that your original forgiveness was not true or real. This may be the case. Only you know whether or not your forgiveness was genuine. But the fact that you feel like you have to forgive again does not mean you failed in forgiveness the first time... or the first 100 times. It just means that the process continues. This is likely what Jesus meant when He was talking to His disciples about this very subject. Peter came to Him and said, “Lord, how many times could my brother sin against me and I forgive him? As many as seven times?” “I tell you, not as many as seven,” Jesus said to him, “but 70 times seven. For this reason, the kingdom of heaven can be compared to a king who wanted to settle accounts with his slaves. When he began to settle accounts, one who owed 10,000 talents (almost $5 billion) was brought before him. Since he had no way to pay it back, his master commanded that he, his wife, his children, and everything he had be sold to pay the debt. At this, the slave fell facedown before him and said, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you everything!’ Then the master of that slave had compassion, released him, and forgave him the loan. But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him 100 denarii (about $8,000). He grabbed him, started choking him, and said, ‘Pay what you owe!’ At this, his fellow slave fell down and began begging him, ‘Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’ But he wasn’t willing. On the contrary, he went and threw him into prison until he could pay what was owed. When the other slaves saw what had taken place, they were deeply distressed and went and reported to their master everything that had happened. Then, after he had summoned him, his master said to him, ‘You wicked slave! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me. Shouldn’t you also have had mercy on your fellow slave, as I had mercy on you?’ And his master got angry and handed him over to the jailers to be tortured until he could pay everything that was owed. So My heavenly Father will also do to you if each of you does not forgive his brother from his heart.” So Jesus said we should forgive an offending party hundreds of times if need be. This could get old. And it could test not only your resolve, but make you question whether or not you actually forgave the person. But the fact that you have to keep forgiving does not mean you did not truly forgive in the first place. It simply means we live in a world that is broken... even after you've done your part to fix it. And Jesus gave a number that is difficult to keep track of. This is because if you are counting the number of times you forgive, watching for that magic number where you can stop, you aren't truly forgiving. Basically, you are to lose count of how many times you forgive someone. When a ship crosses the ocean, it does not simply set its course once and sail directly to its intended destination. The captain is constantly having to set the course. There are variable like the water, wind, etc., that affect the ship. So the course is set multiple times. This doesn't mean the original setting was wrong, or that he didn't do his job. It simply means that the journey is a process. The same is true with forgiveness. Today as you forgive others, remember that you may have to forgive the same person multiple times. This doesn't necessarily reflect failure in your life. After all, think about how many times Christ has forgiven you for the same infraction. You wouldn't say He failed to forgive the first time, would you? You would probably say that His longsuffering in the forgiveness department is an example of His great grace and love. The same is true of those who forgive others time after time. Let's be consistent agents of grace and love today... not one-hit wonders. This is an absolutely free resource. If you would like to support us, you can give via the above link.
I don't think it is a stretch to say that personal conflict is part of every day in every life. If you have two people, you will eventually have conflict. There are currently 7.5 billion people on the planet. You do the math. There are many elements to conflict. It would be impossible to deal with every element in one devotional, so this one will look at unforgiveness. Regardless of whether the offense is real or imagined, one of the worst things that comes from the situation is something we call unforgiveness. Unforgiveness is the intentional act of not forgiving a person for a wrong. (It can also be withholding forgiveness from someone for a perceived wrong. That sounds strange, but you can believe someone wronged you when they didn't, and in the process, hold bad feelings toward that person, expecting them to apologize for something they never actually did.) If forgiveness is letting go of the right to hold someone guilty for something they did to you, unforgiveness is not letting go of that right to hold them guilty. But unforgiveness is not just neglecting to let it go. It is a decision to not let it go. When someone hurts us, our natural defenses go up with our sense of justice. Everyone has a sense of right and wrong, even if it isn't grounded in the Bible or a relationship with God. We don't like it when people hurt us. When it happens, we determine that the hurt will only go so far. The way we try to stop the hurt is by holding the hurt against them. Now, in God's view, people are personally responsible for whatever hurt they cause. No excuses. He is the ultimate scorekeeper. But since He is the perfect scorekeeper, He tells us that we aren't to keep score. We are not to hold things against people. We are not to hurt them back by withholding forgiveness. As Christians, we are to exhibit the nature of our Father, God. God has been wronged by everyone who has ever lived. Yet, that holy God who never wronged anyone, and has the ultimate right to hold our wrongs against us has chosen to let it go. He forgives freely. So if a God who has the right to withhold forgiveness does not, what does that mean for us who have actually hurt many people ourselves? Well, the Bible is full of teaching that tells us we must forgive. I won't list them all here. I will just reference one. "Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful." Colossians 3:12-15 We are to forgive because the Lord forgave us. The fact is, that should be enough. But Scripture is full of such commands. I dare you to go to www.BibleGateway.com and search the word 'forgive'. Letting go of the right to hold someone guilty is counterintuitive to our fallen nature. But it is a core element of our new nature in Christ. Unforgiveness hurts us more than it hurts the person who wronged us. Why? Because we are sinning against the other person, and ourselves, and God at the same time. Unforgiveness has been described as drinking a bottle of poison in the hopes that the other person will die. Often times the offending party doesn't even know you are not forgiving them. Unforgiveness does not hold them accountable. It holds you in a prison. Forgiveness is not as much about setting the other offender free, but setting you... the offended offender free. It has been said that forgiveness is like a dungeon where the lock is on the inside and you have the key. Satan has tricked us into thinking that unforgiveness is an expression of justice. But God didn't make us ambassadors of justice in this world. He made us ambassadors of reconciliation. "And all of this is a gift from God, who brought us back to himself through Christ. And God has given us this task of reconciling people to him. For God was in Christ, reconciling the world to himself, no longer counting people’s sins against them. And he gave us this wonderful message of reconciliation. So we are Christ’s ambassadors; God is making his appeal through us. We speak for Christ when we plead, 'Come back to God!' For God made Christ, who never sinned, to be the offering for our sin, so that we could be made right with God through Christ." (2 Corinthians 5:18-21) Forgiveness may be the most powerful weapon we have against sin. Forgiveness is one way to bridge the gap between the sinner and the Savior. Afterall, it is exactly what the Father used through Christ. No one ever came to Christ through unforgiveness. No one ever repaired or restored a relationship through unforgiveness. But I have seen broken marriages, families, churches, and communities mended because someone stepped up and forgave those who had wronged them. Unforgiveness is not a key that opens the door to reconciliation. It is a dagger that continually stabs the heart of the one who holds it. Today you will have the opportunity to forgive or not forgive. Forgiving doesn't change the other person. It just means that you won't allow their wrong to keep you from being right. Practice forgiveness one hurt at a time and watch healing become the pattern for your life. This is an absolutely free resource. If you would like to support us, you can give via the above link.
It has become popular to balance out evil deeds with good deeds in order to make a bad person look better. If it comes out that a person has mistreated someone else, you will soon learn about an instance where that person did something good for other people. This ostensibly wipes away the wrong, or at least balances it out so the wrong doesn't seem so bad. Unfortunately, that's not how it works. Or are we fortunate that isn't how it works? Everyone does bad things. Everyone does good deeds. Your favorite person does bad things. Your least favorite person does good deeds. I know that is difficult to imagine, and we don't want to give any good credit to those we dislike, but it is true. History tells us that Hitler was kind to animals. Imagine a conversation about the atrocities of the Holocaust where Hitler's regime was responsible for the killing of 6 million Jews, and someone says, "Yes, but he made sure his pets were well taken care of." Would that change your opinion of Hitler? If only... if only good deeds could erase or balance out the horrible effects of bad deeds. But they don't. The prophet Isaiah wrote, "You welcome the one who joyfully does what is right; they remember You in Your ways. But we have sinned, and You were angry. How can we be saved if we remain in our sins? All of us have become like something unclean, and all our righteous acts are like a polluted garment; all of us wither like a leaf, and our iniquities carry us away like the wind." (Isaiah 64:5-6) If you have a bucket with 1 greasy, oily, bloody, dirty rag in it, I don't care how many clean clothes you put in that bucket, or how many times you move them around with the dirty rags... the dirty rag will never become clean. And in fact, the dirty rag will make the clean clothes dirty. By adding clean clothes to a box of dirty rags, you don't make the dirty rags disappear, and you don't make them clean. The dirty always contaminates the clean. I have hurt people with my words and actions at times during my life. At the same time I was doing nice things for other people, and sometimes for the same person. But the person I hurt does not care that I gave money to the poor or that I acted nice toward other people. My good words and deeds cannot wash away my evil words and deeds. The apostle Paul wrote on this very subject, "If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing." (1 Corinthians 13:2-3) Basically he is saying, "Who cares how much I act like a Christian? Who cares how much spiritual power I have Who cares how much money I give to the poor? Who cares how how much I sacrifice? Who cares how many good deeds I do? Who cares about these things, if I mistreat people? If I don't truly love people, every good deed I do is worth nothing." We tend to grade people we like on a curve, while we tend to grade people we dislike with a hammer. "Yeah, this guy may have done a bad thing, but look at the good stuff they've done. And look at the other guy... just look at all the bad stuff he's done. I mean, that is horrible." We also do this with ourselves. But we just need to stop doing it with everyone. The only thing that can erase any and all of my badness is the goodness of Christ. This is available through His blood which was poured out on the cross to cleanse us from all of our sin. This doesn't mean that doing good deeds is of no value. But my good deeds aren't good enough on their own. They only have eternal value in the context of redemption through Jesus. And it is probably a good thing that I can't balance out my own evil deeds. Earlier I suggested that it may be a good thing that our good deeds don't balance out our bad actions. How could that be a good thing? Because if I could balance out my bad with my goof, I would probably not feel as bad about hurting people, knowing that I could just rack up some extra good deeds to make it all even. We can't make it even. But Jesus can make us forgiven and pure. And that is better than even. Today you have the opportunity to do good or evil. Choose good. You never have to balance out or wipe away the good you do. This is an absolutely free resource. If you would like to support us, you can give via the above link.
We hear a lot of talk today about 'principles'. These are not people who are over a school. Those are principals. My teacher told me that you can remember the difference because of the word 'pal' that is found in 'principal'. The man in charge of the school is your pal. Hmmm... that was always difficult to imagine... especially whenever I was sitting outside of his office I didn't feel very chummy with him. But I digress. Like many of our words, the word 'principle' has multiple meanings, but for our purpose today a principle is... "A moral rule or belief that helps you know what is right and wrong and that influences your actions." Each person has certain principles. Principles are the moral foundation for our belief and activity. Most of us have shared principles. These principles were taught to us by our parents, teachers, preachers, and even the neighbors up and down the street. Principles keep us on the right track. They are boundary markers. Principles keep us from stealing, cheating, committing adultery, raping, cursing at people, being violent, gossiping etc. Think of your principles as a homing device or alert system. Maybe a shock collar. The closer you get to a place you are not supposed to be, the more you will feel a resistance in your spirit. When faced with a moral decision, your principles sound off. Principle says, "Nope... I know you are hungry. But you don't steal. Stealing food is not the way to be filled. You will not be satisfied if you steal food to remove hunger. You are better off hungry than you are being a thief. I know everyone else is stealing food. But you aren't everyone else. You won't answer according to everyone else. You have me. You will answer for how your actions measure up with me." If you are a person of principle, you will act upon your principle. If you act against your principle, you are not a person of principle. You aren't a principled person. It used to be that many people were principled people. Many people had this moral compass that told them the right thing to do in various situations... and since they were principled people, they actually lived according to their principles. But then it became popular for people to act however they wanted against their principles and excuse or justify their actions by saying, "Well, in a perfect world, I would do what I know is right, but I have to do what I know is wrong in order to live." This is ironic. First... we never live in a perfect world here. So if that is justification for doing what is wrong when we know what is right, then everyone can do wrong and no one can complain about it. And you certainly can't complain about the world not being perfect if you are going to live imperfectly yourself. After this became the common path of decision and action, principles became something of a dinosaur. It used to be that people would generally do the right thing regardless of the outcome. This is acting on principle. When a man rushes to a burning car and works hard to rescue a child from certain death, he is considered brave. If he dies because it was an impossible rescue, he is considered a hero. He acted on principle. He did the right thing even though there was little chance of success. He knew he may die, but he knew he had to try and save the child regardless. The American founding fathers signed their lives away on a piece of paper saying they would fight against tyranny, realizing that they may not actually gain freedom, but believing that it was better to die for what is right than live in the wrong. That is principled living. Our principles must play out in our actions or else they are just nice thoughts. If we only act according to our principles when we think it will work out in our favor, we are not principled people. In other words, if I do what I know is wrong for the sake of getting what I want, I do not have 'a moral rule or belief that helps me know what is right and wrong and that influences my actions.' The Bible is very clear that we should be people of principle. In fact, some would say the entirety of Scripture is God expressing and explaining what is right and wrong, and expecting us to live according to that in every situation... not just the easy ones. We are to love... our enemies, not just our friends. We are to give... to the point of sacrifice, not just when our bank account is flush. We are to obey... at all times, not just when everyone else is. Living a principled life will not make you many friends. Being 'principled' has become a dirty word in our modern culture. But our culture should not move us from principles. The Old Testament prophet Isaiah exhorted the people of God, "Listen to Me, you who know righteousness, the people in whose heart is My instruction: do not fear disgrace by men, and do not be shattered by their taunts." (Isaiah 51:7) God has written on our hearts a set of moral rules and these are true regardless of place or time. When we make decisions, we should make them according to these principles given by God. We should not allow fear to guide us away from our principles. We should do everything according to our principles, or else they aren't our principles. The world is watching you today. You can say you are against evil and perversion. But if your actions do not back that up, the world will see you for you who you are. Going against my stated principles just so I can get a promotion, or make life better for myself, or even to keep someone else from doing something wrong will come off as hypocritical. How can I complain about the evil of another if I cast my lot in with evil-doers? The apostle James writes, "It is a sin for the person who knows to do what is good and doesn’t do it." (James 4:17) Don't tell me you are doing something wrong in order to do something right. If you know something is wrong, yet you engage in it or promote it, you are doing the wrong thing. Our minds are professional justifiers. We can justify any wrong action by saying we are doing it for a more important good. But God does not condone that. God is a God who values principles, and rewards people of principle. This is an absolutely free resource. If you would like to support us, you can give via the above link.
I recently took a trip with my wife to the UK. We traveled throughout England and Scotland. One of the things this part of the world is known for is its castles. There are various types of castles But generally a castle is a fortified dwelling, built at a strategic location to provide protection against attack for a group of people. Some of the castles I walked through were over 1,000 years old. Often a castle was built by people who found the location and wanted to live there. But often times it was land given to the person by a king. These castles are not currently as they were when they were built. They are all larger now. Over time, castles grow as the number of people needing its protection grows. Also, the castles have had to rebuild after attacks. I didn't see a single castle that was in pristine condition. In fact, every castle has stories of attack, ruin, and rebuild. Some castles are still 'working castles' because the family or government has maintained it. But some reached a point of disrepair where people just abandoned them. They are currently in ruins. In America we don't build castles like the ones in Europe. But we do say that a man's house is his castle. What we mean is that a man has a place of stability and peace where he can come away from his work and worry, and simply enjoy his place. Even the most humble of homes is a castle to a man who owns it. But as I walked around I began to wonder about castles and this Western phrase. What does it mean to have a castle? What does it mean to maintain a castle? Does it mean that we should be proud of our awesome place, or is a castle something to work more than something to worship? If my home is my castle, my family makes up the inhabitants. God, my King gave me that land. It was a gift. He expected me to build and fortify the area where we would dwell. It was to be a safe place of peace. Surely it would come under attack by various enemies. A castle is not something to polish. It is something to protect. I was to be wise in how I built the walls. The walls were to be high and thick. As it came under attack, it would certainly be broken down in certain areas. This would require rebuilding. Having a castle is not just about making sure the landscape is perfect and the moat water is clean. A family castle is a lot of work. In the Bible times we find people living in castles and palaces. We find fortresses. These were common in those times. A king would build a strong castler or palace in which he would live and have his seat of government. During war, the people in the surrounding community would come inside the walls to live. King David wrote this song, "I love You, Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer, my God, my mountain where I seek refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold. I called to the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and I was saved from my enemies." Psalm 18:1-3 I have not always built, maintained, or protected my castle as well as I could or should have. I have been a slacker at times. And the enemy took advantage of that. I have let walls get broken down, and then did not repair them as quickly or as well as I should. I can look at my castle and see where certain battles occurred. These building and rebuilding lines tell a story. Sometimes the story is not so good. But through it all I can see places where I trusted the Lord and obeyed Him. I can see that the castle of my life and family, though attacked, is not in ruins. God is faithful. He has always been our best defender. He is our strong tower. We need not fear when He is enthroned in our castle. When He is on the throne, the flag or standard is waving in the breeze. This puts the enemy on notice that it is not just dealing with a peasant. But there is a strong warrior who has given that land and is willing to fight for that place. And when I have been derelict in my duty, God has rebuilt and expanded my castle. Be faithful with your castle. Build it well. Maintain it properly. One way to do that is to be obedient to the King. Jesus, after giving His famous Sermon On The Mount said, "Therefore, everyone who hears these words of Mine and acts on them will be like a sensible man who built his house on the rock. The rain fell, the rivers rose, and the winds blew and pounded that house. Yet it didn’t collapse, because its foundation was on the rock. But everyone who hears these words of Mine and doesn’t act on them will be like a foolish man who built his house on the sand. The rain fell, the rivers rose, the winds blew and pounded that house, and it collapsed. And its collapse was great!” - Matthew 7:24-27 This is an absolutely free resource. If you would like to support us, you can give via the above link.
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AuthorMy name is David, and I want to know God more, and help other people find Him. Archives
March 2019
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